The Summer After Everything Stopped
by dilettante
Summary: This story takes place the summer after Sirius' death in OotP. It is a series of vignettes told in the 1st person.
1. Vernon

The Summer After  
  
Chapter 1: Vernon  
  
I watch from the car as Harry embraces his friends and steps reluctantly away toward me.   
_Don't worry, boy, I'm no more eager to see you._  
Here we go again, I say aloud, startling myself.  
The car door opens and suddenly the cacophony of the train station whooshes into the car. The door slams shut and, like a vacuum, heavy silence takes over. I scowl and drive off. We say nothing until I pull into our driveway. I look in the rearview mirror and see his insolent green eyes, staring into me. _Creepy_. As soon as we stop, the boy makes a move to get out.  
Wait, mister, before you go inside let's get one thing clear. No funny business this year. You do as your told. Full stop.  
No response, so I look in the mirror again. He nods. I know that's all I'll get from him, so I get out and go inside, slamming the front door behind me.  
Petunia! I'm home! I hang my coat, go to the den, and turn on the telly.   
My show begins and Harry enters the house, trying to manage his trunk and that dratted molting owl all at once.   
Jesus, boy, stop all that racket! I can't hear the telly! I shout from the den.  
The noise stops. Petunia comes into the den with a cup of tea.   
Oh Vernon, she whines. I can't _stand_ it when he comes. You get so grouchy and Duddy too and I feel like he's always just _staring_ at us, plotting...  
I know Petunia. I know, I say. _And you turn up the whining full blast._ I turn toward the TV in the hopes that she'll get the hint and leave, but she remains in front of me.  
  
Yes, darling? _Maybe I wouldn't be so grouchy if you'd leave me in peace!  
_We should get dear Dudley something to make up for Harry coming. You know he takes it _so_ hard. _Would she ever shut-up about that hulking son of hers?  
_Yes, dear, you're right. Get him whatever you think he wants. You're always so good at spoiling the little tyke. Now, maybe she'd leave.   
Oh _good_. I'll go see him right now. He's working _so_ hard on his summer schoolwork, he needs a break... Her voice fades as she leaves the room. _Whew_. _ A little peace.  
_The TV show drones on; my mind wanders. _Gotta fire that tech worker tomorrow. Should I do it in my office or in front of the tech department? That could set an example... but it could spark dissent. Oh come on, everyone know he's a lazy lout, they won't care... Gotta order a new shipment of WD-40. How do we--  
_My thoughts are interrupted by a crash from upstairs and then Petunia's shriek. _I can't take this. _ I storm upstairs, pounding each stair as hard as I can as I go. _God, he's only been here 30 minutes... _  
I reach the top of the stairs and Petunia comes rushing to me.  
Vernon, oh _Vernon_! I -- I push past her, towards Harry's room.  
He was trying to push his trunk into his room, but ended up crashing into the wall, chipping the paint and knocking over a lamp and two wall hangings. _That was the crash, then. _Now he is righting the lamp. I grab his arm above the elbow, drag him into his room, and slam the door behind us. I am already so angry, I can't imagine how this is only the beginning of the summer.  
Look, boy, maybe I didn't make myself clear in the car. I will not have you wreaking havoc on my life while you're here. He doesn't say a word. Just that creepy stare.  
Its not been thirty minutes and already you have my wife in hysterics. I don't have any qualms about doing what I need to do to get some peace around here. Don't leave this room for any reason for the rest of the night. I don't want to know you're here. He nods and drops his eyes. I give him a shake and push him away as I turn to leave. He teeters and seems to shrink. He's too quiet..._scheming_. _Well, I won't put up with that nonsense this year. _As I walk out Petunia tries to intercept me again. I move to avoid her and end up tripping over the boy's blasted trunk.   
Petunia gasps. _Damn it!   
_I kick the trunk into Harry's room and once again slam the door behind myself. _How would I survive without doors to slam?  
_ I cut her off with a look and a hand.  
Petunia. Don't disturb me until dinner. I don't even wait for her response as I lock myself in our bedroom and switch the telly on. Loud.   
  
****************  
I am in bed with my wife. All is dark and quiet. The incessant noise of the day has finally stopped. I sigh and turn over in relief, eager for sleep to come. I can tell I will look forward to bedtime each night for the rest of the summer....  
_Why am I awake? _ I fumble for my clock. 3:47 am. _Damn_. In the next room I hear violent sobbing. I roll over and put the pillow over my head to drown it out. On and on the boy sobs. Right when I think he's finally stopped he carries on again. Petunia doesn't even stir. I try to wake her by kicking her. Its _her_ bloody nephew. She should have to be awake, too. She jerks and rolls over, nearly on top of me. I kick her again, and I hear her reach for her own clock and curse as she sees the time. 4:02 am. The boy shows no sign of shutting up. There'll be hell to pay tomorrow, mark my words. 4:11 am. If anything he's getting louder. Petunia thinks I'm still asleep. 4:18 am. Why isn't she shutting him up? Wait...she heaves herself out of bed and pads quickly out of the room. I hear a sharp slap, then a whimper, the door closes...and silence. _Ah, mission accomplished. _ I roll over once and remember nothing more but my dreams of Petunia and Harry locked in his trunk together.  



	2. Lupin

The Summer After Everything Stopped  
  
Chapter 2: Lupin  
  
For what its worth, its not as bad as it was when James and Lily were killed. I don't feel so helpless, so alone, despite being the last remaining Marauder. But this time he died on our side, like a hero. Its comforting. And, no one could ever be Sirius, but I have the Order now. Unwaveringly. Sometimes I still have to pinch myself to make sure I'm not still up in my lonely Northern cabin, warded away from all save the howling wind...  
Why am I always sitting up like this? Its been four days since the award ceremony and I haven't slept a proper wink since then. Every night I give myself the same rationalizing comfort speech. Ineffective, of course, but I've come to a conclusion, but oh, its so dark...I can allow myself to think it only now, in the dead of night. But even in this witching hour I feel like Sirius can hear my thoughts and condemn me for them. I blame Harry. When my thoughts are unguarded, I blame Harry. For not learning to block out Voldemort, for letting Snape get to him, for being so goddamn impetuous and guilt-ridden. And then the image of his face as Sirius fell stabs into my mind and I want to fall through that veil myself. He didn't come to the award ceremony. Tonks went to get him and he refused to come. She said he looked like hell and told her Sirius was coming to get him soon. And I _blame_ him.  
  
*******************  
Remus! Remus!  
What the _hell_ time is it? _ Ow, my neck!_ I've slept on my window seat, all twisted up...  
  
_I'm coming, I'm coming._ I reach my fire and am snapped out of my grogginess by the face in it. My mind fills in the details of her features that the Floo powder blurs. Smooth, almost translucent skin, such bright eyes, electric smile. _Please smile...  
_  
_Shit_.   
You all right?  
Yes, yes, of course. I blush slightly. She caught me.  
Remus, we want you to go see Harry at the Muggle's house.  
Guilt rushes back to me as I remember my thoughts before I fell asleep.  
He talks to Sirius, Remus. He needs someone _alive_ to talk to...someone to make him realize that Sirius isn't coming back.   
I take a deep breath and let it out noisily. She sighs. I sigh.  
Look, I know this isn't easy for you. Its not for any of us. But think of Harry, of Ja--  
I'll go, Tonks, shut up. I need to do this for myself as much as Harry, I realize. To atone.   
Good. I'll tell Dumbledore to open the Floo network. Remus...?  
I look up, meet her eyes. She smiles. _Finally_...and I can't help but smile back.  
  
********************  
_I'm in a huge auditorium. Crowded and rustling with the anticipation of a show about to begin. The stage lights blink on smoothly and nearly blind me. Cabaret music jauntily fills the hall, and..._Tonks_...? Tonks sashés (since when Tonks _sashé_?) onto the stage to thunderous applause and whistling. I want to whistle, too, but my jaw is locked in the open position. A _very_ skimpy blue sequined costume reveals too much of her snowy skin...I am jerked to reality when the audience quiets after her bow. The music starts up again, and she launches into a tap dance. I find myself following her smile, not her curves as she taps...tap, tap, tap...across the stage. It feels like she's looking straight at me, all the while tapping...tap, tap, tap, tap...why are her taps louder than the orchestra? tap, tap, tap, TAP, TAP, TAP.._.  
I jerk awake. TAP, TAP, TAP, TAP...and notice vaguely that I'm in my bed, not a concert hall...TAP, TAP, TAP...my mind clears. An owl. I sigh and open my window.  
  
R,   
Its open. Go now.  
-D.  
  
_Good timing, Albus. Jesus._ Tonks' smile and the duty ahead of he competing for the attention of my mind, I clumsily get dressed. Who knows how long he'll keep the Floo connection open...  
  
********************  
A/N:  
Senna, BubblyFizz03, and Zaara:  
My three precious reviewers! Thanks for your input. It inspired me to continue...(finally!) 


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